Gabriel will sit for long periods of time on my lap in front of this computer. Most of the time, he doesn't want anything from me. He just wants to sit with me. Be near me. For the most part, he doesn't even give in to the temptation of pushing the keys on the keyboard or playing with the mouse. He is amazing. He doesn't talk much yet, but I know he loves me. He wants to be with me almost everywhere I go. When I wash dishes, he sits on the counter. When I fold clothes, he takes them out of the dryer. When I want to watch TV, he wants to be right there with me. I remember it being this way with the other boys, but with Gabriel, there is something unique about him and his desire to be with me. I can't really explain it.
As I am sitting here reflecting on the beautiful gift that is watching my fingers move as he gently strokes my arm and rests his head on my chest, I wonder if this is how God feels. Or am I holding up my end of this scenario? Do I give God the feeling that I would be content just to sit with Him? Be near Him? Just sit and watch His every move?
It is my goal to make God feel the way Gabriel makes me feel. I love that Gabriel wants to be close and occasionally turn his head around, and tap me (which seems to be his main form of communication) just to see if I am paying attention to him. Do I make God feel this same way? How much more does He love me than I love my little one? I stand amazed.
Will Gabriel always be this way with me? I truly hope.
Will I always be this way with my Father? I truly hope.
Father, I love You. Just to be with You, I'd do anything.