I am tired. It's official.
Tired of wrapping presents, getting presents, trying to be cheerful, trying to fix things that I can't fix....
I'm ready for renewal....of so many things.
I have been broken down, broken down, broken down...and despite the 3gifts blog entry a few minutes ago, I don't feel very fortunate, I don't feel excited. I'm finding it hard to feel at all...at this moment. That will change in about 2.5, though, 'cause I'm me...
Besides all of this, I'm just tired.

I can't find one of the Christmas presents I bought. My house ate it. I'm frustrated by that. And that is like the least of all my worries, yet, it's so huge and yet so little.

How long do you hold on to something that may have already drifted away? How long can you tread water before being swallowed up by it all? How long do you fight?

I'm tired...tired of holding, treading, fighting, feeling, pretending.

Drew and Evan

Drew and Evan's Christmas program for their preschool was last night, and I could barely hear them, but they were CUTE CHRISTMAS TREE DECORATORS! (That was their part! :) ) Drew is in the maroon shirt and Evan is wearing the striped sweater.
Enjoy!

drugs are good...

PRESCRIPTION DRUGS that is. If it tells you anything, I don't remember Friday afternoon. The doctor hooked this busy mommy up! Unfortunately, it makes me pretty loopy any other time.....that's not good. MY piano playing for worship band was not the best today, but the communion music was pretty good. I played "I Wonder as I Wander." IT's one of my favorites. It has such great lyrics, and I think of my mom when I hear it. She must have sung it when I was young. The melody is so haunting. It's simple and effective for that use. I liked it.

Anyway, Luke, Drew, and Evan sang this morning at church. Since my digital camera was stolen a while back, I don't have pictures, but I took some with my Dad and Jenny's camera. When I get them, I will post them. I even took a video, and if I can figure out how to post it, I will. It was cute! They were adorable, of course.








I know it is hard to see them, but Evan is in green, Drew is in maroon, and Luke is in light blue. They are standing behind the two soloists.

Also, had the opportunity to get with Audrey last night! It's good to catch up. It was a fun night with home cooked food, OREO BALLS (Email me for that recipe!!!), and gifts! Thanks to Audrey for a fun evening!!!

And now back to our program already in progress

1. I have had a fever since Monday. I feel better but it lingers.

2. My washer flooded our kitchen AGAIN. The grand total is 6 times. I have been pushed around, ignored, lied to, overlooked by Best Buy. Shout it from the rooftops! Doesn't matter if you buy the repair policy....their service stinks. Maybe more on this later. Suffice it to say that I'm looking at a minimum of 2 weeks without using my brand new machine....my brand new $1000 machine.

3. I have missed either a partial or full day of school every day this week. I'm beginning to think I may not be welcomed back. I have missed all the parties that I planned on the Christmas committee. I will miss the gift giving when I was in charge of one very special gift, probably one that will bring tears. I'm bummed about it....but I'll live.

4. Christmas is coming and I have not gotten all of the people bought for, and the illness is setting me back.

5. I ache all over.

6. Gabriel had shots on Tuesday and has another round on Jan. 23. He screamed really loud for one really long burst, but that was about it. I think everyone within a block had to have heard it.

7. I'm ready to see my family members traveling in for Christmas in a HUMONGO way! I don't know if it is the fever talking or what, but sometimes you just miss your mom....and of course, I miss Todd and Micah! :) They won't believe how big my boys are getting.

8. Luke wrote me this note yesterday, all by himself, obviously:
Dear Mome (pronounced "Mommy"), I hpope (hope) you r felwlng (feeling) goud (good). Love, Luke. I LOVE IT. It was accompanied by 27 cents. He's getting so big.

9. I'm ready to go lay down now....I've been up a lot more than yesterday and I am exhausted.

10. Please pray that I can get back to the norm soon. Chad has been Mom and Dad the past few days, and I think everyone is ready to go back to routine. He's done a great job and hasn't complained once, and I appreciate it!

ferie retribuite, part 2

Well, those of you who have expressed concern over my post (2 posts ago), most of everything is taken care of. The account has been credited all of the Italian expenses and all of the fees that happened as a result of the drained account. That's a definite load off my mind. The only residual effects lingering now is that we are debit card-less. Have you lived without one of those for a while? I didn't realize how dependent I was on it until it was gone. It will probably be 2 weeks before the new one arrives, so all the accounts that automatically get paid each mongh using those numbers will have to be updated and called to say "This is why you didn't get your money and the card denied payment..." Boy, is that fun! :)

I can't complain too much, though. God came through. I have a few extra things to do now around the already hectic Holiday season, but it could always be worse, I suppose.

Thanks for the prayers. Although I'm not out of the woods on ALL of it, at least that small part has been taken care of.

Alternative to Myspace

So, some of you may have seen or heard of or are a part of the Myspace frenzy. A friend of mine told me about the Christian alternative to Myspace called Ditty talk. It has a Bible search area, prayer requests, and pretty strict rules about your profile. I went ahead and checked it out. www.dittytalk.com/worshipful1. I hope it takes off like Myspace. What a statement it would be for the Christians of the world if those who claimed to be a Christian kept their websites as clean as God would....hmm....